Crash the Party
by Haley's Comet
Summary: Sean left for Wasaga leaving Ellie heartbroken, and told Jay to look after her. What happens when Jay gets closer to Ellie then planned? Jallie. Re-vamped.
1. Oh Lately It's So Quiet

**Disclaimer:**** I do **_**not**_** own Degrassi. All I do own are the ideas of this, and every other fan fiction I write. Degrassi: the next generation was revived from the earlier Degrassi shows by Schuyler and Stephen Stohn, and is rightfully owned by them, and the N. I wish I did own the Degrassi characters though—I would be like a puppet master. Dance puppets, dance! **

**I have been thinking about writing this story for the longest time now, and I'm so happy I finally got around to it. This is my first song-fic, so be sure to tell me how you like it. I'm asking you to be honest, just don't be too brutal if it's awful. I don't take insensitive assessment well… Just kidding. Be as blunt as you like; I can take it. The only thing I wouldn't be able to stand is people putting down the Ellie/Jay pairing, because they are friggin' awesome together in my opinion. **

**By the by, I just watched an interview with Mike Lobel (Jay), and when he was asked which character he thought Jay should hook up with, he said Ellie. See? If Mike Lobel sees it, why can't the writers of Degrassi? Come now.**

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**Chapter One:**** Oh Lately It's So Quiet**

As I awake from a silent dreamless sleep, I look around at my empty and soulless abode. The walls that once contained me when I was at the happiest point of my life, were now bleak, and bare. He made this expressionless place a home; he made this unadorned piece of shelter not so lonesome. With Sean around this place seemed more extraordinary, and then I realized it was just because he made everything in my life so much better. Now, when I gazed out into the night the vibrant stars were replaced by cloudy gruesomeness, and as I fall asleep my dreams coil into restless horrors. My nightmares are my burden, but still his liability.

_**(Oh no) Oh lately it's so quiet in this place**_

_**You're not round every corner**_

_**(oh no) Oh lately it's so quiet in this place**_

_**So darlin if you're not here haunting me**_

_**I'm wondering...**_

We were so happy here together. I just don't understand how you can make a broken little Goth girl whole again, and then just leave her astonished and faltering without you by her side when you're what she needs most. I remember what life was like without Sean, and I don't want that again. I'm not going to let anybody _put me through_ that again. Not even the one person who's had the most impact in my life.

I've gone a very long time without cutting. That was all because of Sean too. He made me want to be better because he was whom I lived for. I can still visualize him with me sometimes, late at night and when I'm sleep-deprived. When I awake in the morning I see the light dancing over his insipid flesh, casting shadows like dark emphasis over his flawless features. When I come to realization that he is gone, he withdraws from my conscious. He's a ghost that haunts me for my mindless devotion. I felt…cursed.

Nothing but a shell was left from me. I let him take all that I had because I finally obtained somebody I thought I could trust. I've never been dependant on anybody in my entire life before him. When I lived with my mother I was constantly being troubled and forced to be the grown-up. While she would drink herself into her pathetic and lonely comas, I was the only one around to pick up the pieces. I had to manage everything by myself. Sean took that responsibility away from me to finally put me at ease. He put my life at rest, causing me to never perform the self-destruction that I once craved since.

I couldn't resist wondering whether or not he has found somebody better then be by now. Every time I think about it, it just makes everything worse, but I can't help it. He's not the type of guy would fall for the first bimbo he met, I mean—I know he's not in Wasaga oogling over some trashy, blond, beach babe but that doesn't mean he hasn't found someone. He hasn't called me, sent me any letters or made any contact what-so-ever, so yeah—it hurt. And quite frankly left me a little bitter, too.

_**Whose house, are you haunting tonight?**_

_**Aw. Whose sheets you twist**_

_**Aw. Whose face you kiss**_

_**Whose house, are you haunting tonight?**_

I hastily shake the thoughts out of my mind. What am I thinking? He's probably just moping around the house and watching TV all day with a gallon of chocolate milk in his lap. Oh yes, that's very attractive. He was always rather—brutey. He had a sensitive side he hid from the world, but I've never thought anything wrong with it. One of the things I loved most about our relationship was that I got to find out so much more about him. I felt so special and trusted to learn about his most closely guarded secrets. That's why I was so hurt when he wouldn't tell me about what really happened with Rick. That's why I was so upset when he talked to Emma instead of me—his _girlfriend._

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_**Flashback:**_

The beach airstream breezed through my scarlet ringlets as the rest of my body remained motionless. Sean sitting in the sand quite a bit ahead of me captured my gaze. After seeing Emma sit down beside him, I watched closer and more carefully as I noticed them going deep into conversation. Why was she talking to him? I shouldn't have been so jealous over this, I know—but I couldn't help it. All they were doing was speaking to each other and I felt as if he were cheating on me or something. Why wouldn't he talk to me about anything he was going through? He was being so distant, and I loathed this feeling.

_**(Oh no) I don't think much about you anymore**_

_**You're not on every whisper, oh**_

_**(Oh no) I don't think much about you**_

_**But if you're not lurking behind every curtain**_

_**I'm wondering...**_

Suddenly, taking my attention off of Sean and little-miss-perfect, Jay sat down next to me. I took a deep sigh, awaiting some kind of confrontation, but there wasn't one. He lay back on a towel and turned onto his side, facing me. I thought for sure he would make fun of me for sulking around, but he stayed silent, waiting for me to begin the conversation.

I raised an eyebrow and stared at him suspiciously. "Do you _need_ something?" I asked, hints of both venom and sarcasm, coming together in a perfect bitter harmony.

He sighed and shook his head at me. "Calm down, Red. Did anyone ever say you can be a bit of a shrew?"

I rolled my eyes and sat up and then got up to my feet, angrily. "I'm leaving."

Jay smirked and pulled me back down into a sitting position. "Don't get your panties in a twist Nash, I was just kidding."

I hesitated, staring at him with curiosity. "Okay—then what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be chasing down half-naked beach babes before we head back to Toronto?"

Jay's eyes narrowed, as if he were considering this. "That's tempting, but no. Anyways, I was wondering what has you all worked up. You've been moping around all day."

I glared at him irritably, and then turned my head to ignore him completely. I knew this was coming. Jay and I don't exactly…play nice. That's just an easy way of saying we loath each other and fight constantly. When I didn't hear him speak for a few seconds, I glanced in his direction to see him staring at Emma and Sean, like I had been earlier.

"Oh, I get it." He said a little softer turning towards me again.

"Get what?" I spat back, defensively.

"You're all worried because you think Greenpeace is moving in on Sean."

I was taken back for a few seconds. How did he know? It angered me how he thought he had everything all figured out, but not nearly as much as it angered me that he was absolutely right. "Shut up, Jay" I grumbled, "Don't be such a jerk."

"Whoa, touch a nerve there, did I?" He asked. I sighed as he continued. "Look, Red, I didn't mean to piss you off, alright? Anyways I honestly don't think you have anything to worry about. Emma wasn't right for Sean, they were like polar opposites. You and him just seem to have more in common."

"Look, I'm not saying he's going to leave me for Emma, okay? I'm just—" I stopped and shook my head as if stopping myself from saying anything remotely meaningful. "Whatever."

"No—what were you going to say?" He asked forcefully. I glanced at him for what was meant to be a brief moment, but I was drawn into his baby-blue eyes. This is the first time I had ever heard him talking like he was sincere, so color me surprised if you wish.

"I'm just wondering why he can talk to Emma about what he's going through when he—" I wavered, rolling my eyes.

"Won't tell you anything?" He asked, meeting my gaze.

I took in a deep breath and nodded, recognizing defeat. "I just don't understand why he has to _keep_ things from me. I mean there's this big space between us and it just keeps getting _bigger." _I wasn't sure why I was telling him all this, but I was mostly just confused on why he cared. I've never seen Jay act nicely towards anyone with a pure motive.

"Look, Red—I really don't think you have anything to worry about. Sean probably just doesn't want to tell you things because he doesn't want you to worry about him, you know? I mean, if you're worried about him not loving you, you're wrong, alright?"

I couldn't help but smile when I saw his face. I found myself incapable of restraining myself from making fun of him. "Wow, who knew the infamous Jay Hoggart had a sensitive side?" The look he gave me after I said that appeared to be murderous, making me laugh even more. "What?—All mad about me pointing out your underbelly?"

"My _underbelly_ is rock hard." He said defensively.

"Okay, ya' big softy." I then giggled uncharacteristically, causing him to look at me skeptically. He then lifted his beer and hovered it over my head; threatening to pour it on me if I didn't shut up.

I calmed my laughter and bit my lip to keep myself quite until the beverage recoiled. He laughed from his own victory and stared at me mockingly. I retaliated by flinging some sand at him, much to his disdain. He hit me back him some, and it turned into a full-fledged sand war until we were interrupted by Sean getting up, and gesturing for us all to head to the car. I followed obediently, but still giggling.

_**End of flashback**_

* * *

Part of me still blamed Jay for Sean leaving. Jay, Alex and Spinner were after all the reason why Rick brought a gun to school in the first place. I felt so selfish feeling this way, but I wasn't sure what else to do, because Sean was gone and for all I knew he was never coming back. And why should he? There's nothing worth coming back to in Toronto anyhow. Least of all, _me._ Oh—but god knows there's always _Emma._

_**Now whose house, are you haunting tonight?**_

_**Aw. Who can't resist**_

_**Aw. Whose cryin'**_

_**Whose house, are you haunting tonight?**_

_**Aw. Whose name you hiss**_

_**Aw. Whose sheets you twist**_

_**Whose house, are you haunting tonight?**_

_**(Oh no)**_

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**And, that was the first chapter! Did you like it? Don't just answer that in your head—review! The more reviews I get the more inspiration I have to write more chapters, to keep em' coming. I also want to know about the Jay/Ellie pairing because if everyone likes it, I have more Jallie fan fictions planned. Thank you so much for reading!**


	2. I'm Only Happy When It Rains

**Thanks for the reviews! It's so cool that I have some people who are interested in the story so far. Anyways, it's been requested for me to post the links to the Vside interview with Mike Lobel, so here they are… (There broken into parts)**

**h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?vgX4AeSYZBE8  
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**h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?v57zm2lVvNE&featurerelated**

**h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?vcWDHlK5mdgw&featurerelated**

**h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?vuWzIG3qSSAg&featurerelated**

(Remember to delete the spaces that are in the begining)

Please R&R, and if you have any thoughts on this chapter or ideas for the upcoming ones, I'd love to hear about them.

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**Chapter 1: I'm Only Happy When it Rains**

Ellie Nash was a girl who most people would assume nobody would look twice at. She appeared to be rather plain looking, disregarding her long, wavy red hair. A lot of people who think they know her who don't. Everyone, except for her close friends who know better, just see her as _quiet. _She doesn't socialize much with people outside of her own group at _Degrassi High, _but that isn't all by her own choice. A lot of people avoid her just because she's-- different. Different then all the other lame people constantly wanting a place to fit in.

_**I'm only happy when it rains  
I'm only happy when it's complicated  
And though I know you can't appreciate it  
I'm only happy when it rains  
You know I love it when the news is bad  
Why it feels so good to feel so sad  
I'm only happy when it rains**_

Ellie was walking through the halls of Degrassi High, in other words hell, but stopped in her tracks as she saw Marco up ahead. She smiled and caught up with him but he seemed rather preoccupied—frantic even. He was sitting on a bench with a lap-full of papers, rummaging through them and mumbling or possibly cursing to himself angrily. She almost didn't even want to bother him, but she was dying to find out what was up.

_**Pour your misery down  
Pour your misery down on me  
Pour your misery down  
Pour your misery down on me**_

"Hey Marco" She said cheerfully, right up to his face. Ellie thought he was about to drop all of his stuff by the look of surprise he gave her, but instead he mumbled something of a hello and began looking back down at his things. "What's wrong?" She asked, now not even caring if she was disturbing him.

"I-- can't-- find-- my-- essay-- _**anywhere**_**!**" Marco puffed out between stressful breaths.

"So? What's the big deal? One day late on one stupid essay won't make much a difference, will it?"

Marco just started at her blankly as if he couldn't comprehend what she just told him. Ellie began staring back before he took a deep sigh and rolled his eyes as if to say _'you don't know me at all, do you?"_

"Or maybe it does make a difference… Wouldn't want to put a blemish on your perfect report card, oh _no._" Ellie said sarcastically trying to amuse him, but it wasn't working, so she just sighed and took a different approach. "What class is it for anyways?"

"World history" He replied, not even looking up at her.

"World history? Wow, I didn't even know you were taking that class." She said. "By the way Marco, this is so unlike you. You're usually so… on top of things. What's up?"

"I guess I'm just freaking out because we'll be in college soon. Only a couple more years! I know I won't fail high school and get left behind or anything, but I'm still worried. I don't exactly know why. You know what I mean?"

Ellie sat and thought for a minute. "Not really." She replied. "I'm just excited to get out of here." Marco smirked at her and she smiled back at him. She then saw something rather strange through the window. It was Jay Hogart talking to Mr. Simpson. She looked closer, practically pressing her nose up to the glass in interest.

"What do you think _he's_ doing here?" She asked

"Who?" Marco asked turning around. He saw what Ellie was looking at. "Jay? I don't know. I hope he's not coming back to school here. Wouldn't that just make our last year here all the more special? If he does come back, I am _so_ dropping out."

"Wow, Marco-- Rawr." Ellie giggled.

"What are you talking about?"

"I just-- I just didn't know you cared so much, that's all. You just kind of took me by surprise.

"I don't have to like everybody Ellie." Ellie laughed sarcastically at that, causing Marco to go back to ignoring her to find his World History essay.

"Where is it!?" He yelled, causing Ellie to laugh. "What are you laughing at?" He asked. Ellie pulled 3 pieces of paper stapled together out of her bag and held it in front of Marco's face.

"You little sneak!" He said, raising his voice and sounding ridiculous. "How long have you had that?"

"Oh, don't worry not long. It was on the floor by your feet and I saw it right before I spotted Jay." Marco fake-glared at her, but then smiled because he was just happy to have his essay back.

"I better run. I have to talk to Ms. Kwan." Marco said, rising from him seat. "See ya."

"Yeah, bye Marco." Ellie replied, looking back out the window. Jay was just leaving and Ellie felt very strange—Almost like the source of her unhappiness was none other then Jay Hogart.

_**I'm only happy when it rains  
I feel good when things are going wrong  
I only listen to the sad, sad songs  
I'm only happy when it rains**_

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**Flashback**

It's approximately two years in Ellie's past. She's back at Sean's parents house waiting for Sean to finish talking to his parents. She had Emma and Jay nearby, as they were all leaning on the car, ready to leave.

"I told them everything" Sean said, stepping out of the house to everyone's surprise.

"Let's get you out of here." Ellie tried her best to sound comforting, but really she was anxious to get home again.

"Ellie. Look I don't know how--" Sean started, but Ellie interrupted.

"You're, you're staying aren't you?!" Ellie blurted out, looking upset. "Sean, please. I love you."

"I love you too...but Ellie." Ellie looked like she didn't believe him.

"When are you coming back?!" She questioned.

"Yo Cameron! get in the car." Jay yelled out.

"Staying!" Sean yelled back. "I'm staying. Look for the first time in my life I need to be here with my parents, to deal."

"You sure about this?" Jay asked. Sean nodded in reply. "Okay man. See you." Jay then gave Sean a big, brotherly hug and started heading for the car. Ellie began crying lightly and silently as she got into the passengers seat, and avoided looking back through the window at him. She was soon joined by Emma, who sat in the seat behind her. Ellie caught Emma's eye and saw that she was looking out through the window back at Sean.

A while later when they got back to Degrassi, Jay first dropped off Emma, then took a sudden stop at Ellie's place, where she now lived alone. She thought about how she left things with Sean. Why couldn't she just understand? She didn't even say goodbye. She turned into a mopey, needy selfish little girl and just stormed off.

"Okay Nash, this is your stop." Jay said, unlocking the door.

A strange, unforeseeable action came over Ellie as she laid her arms over the dashboard and began to cry. She felt so stupid, but she couldn't help it. Not only did she feel like she was being abandoned by Sean, but she also could sense that he still had some left-over feeling for Emma, and on top of that she felt horrible for how she left everything at Sean's parents house.

Jay then shifted in his seat, and became very interested in the ceiling as he began looking uncomfortable. "Look, man-- Er-- Ellie, don't cry okay?" He said, trying his best to sound sympathetic instead of uncomfortable. "I mean, it's not like he's going to be gone forever, right? I mean, I don't _think_ he is…" This obviously wasn't helping because her cry wasn't weakening in the slightest. He was moving his hand awkwardly to lay it on her shoulder, but when she looked up at him, it caused his hand to drop at his side.

"God, I'm so stupid." She said, sniffling and rubbing her eyes.

"Right, because you were supposed to _see this coming_, or something? Sorry, Red but I don't think--"

"It's not that." Ellie cut him off. She then began gazing out the window, and in a few seconds Jay understood.

"Oh-- Emma?" He asked. Ellie just started at him blankly and looked back outside. "Ellie. I would be lying if I thought that all his feelings of Emma were gone, but come on. He's cares way more about you."

Ellie didn't look back at him or even make and movement of acknowledgement of his last comment at all.

Jay sighed and leaned over Ellie to open her car door. "Come on Nash, I'll walk you up."

They both got out of the car and as they got up to the top step, Ellie stared at him for a few seconds. "So-- You can come in for a little bit, if you want." Ellie said. "It's not like I'm _expecting_ anybody." She added bitterly.

_**I only smile in the dark  
My only comfort is the night gone black  
I didn't accidentally tell you that  
I'm only happy when it rains  
You'll get the message by the time I'm through  
When I complain about me and you  
I'm only happy when it rains**_

Jay wanted to go inside, but one look of Ellie's face screamed vulnerability if he's ever seen it, which would usually be his ticket in, but knowing how upset she was he had to refuse. He faced the facts and knew being with him wouldn't cheer her up, it would only make matters worse.

"Sorry, Red. I've actually got to get going…" Jay said.

"That's okay." Ellie replied, leaning on the front door of the building, holding her keys behind her back. "Well, see you later then?"

"Guess so--" Jay replied. There was a moment when he looked at her and she seemed as if she wanted him to kiss her, but he resisted temptation and ignored false signals as her started heading back to the car. After he left Ellie felt slightly rejected, but then extremely relieved when she woke up the next morning.

**End of Flashback**

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**The song for this fan fiction was I'm Only Happy When It Rains, by Garbage. I really hope you liked the update! I'm truly very excited to continue this story, so leave lots of reviews and I will post the next chapter. By the way, if this chapter seemed some-what familiar to you, it's because this is a story that has been revamped from a one-shot I made. I wanted to re-write it as a longer story, so I deleted the other one. Thank you so much for reading, and remember to review! Reviews give me inspiration to write more! By the way, does anybody want to tell me why the seperation bars from th editing tool aren't working? I had to make my own dividers and I think they look kind of stupid, lol.  
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